Cherub

It's quiet at home today

2011-10-10T11:34:00.000+11:00

It's strangely quiet at home today. The kids are back at school and Jon has gone away for business. I've not been in much today but it already feels much too quiet.

freedigitalphotos.net

Darling Harbour Dancing

2011-09-11T08:07:00.000+10:00

We're off to Darling Harbour today, TJ is dancing again. Unfortunately this time we can't all go. The little one has her soccer presentation day and CJ (not all my kids have J as their middle initial) is playing in the Orange Blossom Festival this afternoon.

So last night we did the curlers again. I put in her hair 50 or the wiggly worm curlers and she tried to sleep on them last night. I hope next year her hairstyle calls for straight.

I did buy a curling wand but I'm not having much success with the curls staying in. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I can get the curls in but they fall after an hour. Not good enough when they need to be in for about 4 - 5 hours.

Here are the before and after shots taken for performances a few weeks ago.

Not happy

2011-09-07T08:53:00.000+10:00

If your child played an instrument in a school band and the band was using music that was written by a convicted pedophile, would you be concerned?

What response would you expect from the school when you raised your concerns?

Would you expect that a parallel could be drawn between the "lifestyle choices" of someone who is gay and a convicted pedophile?

True colors - Cyndi Lauper

2011-08-16T12:51:00.000+10:00

Despite my most recent posts. I heard this yesterday and saw the positive in it. It is not a reflection of my mood ie the sad eyes, it's a reflection of me seeing true colors shining through.

You with the sad eyes

don't be discouraged

oh I realize

it's hard to take courage

in a world full of people

you can lose sight of it all

and the darkness inside you

can make you fell so small

But I see your true colors

shining through

I see your true colors

and that's why I love you

so don't be afraid to let them show

your true colors

true colors are beautiful

like a rainbow

Show me a smile then

don't be unhappy, can't remember

when I last saw you laughing

if this world makes you crazy

and you've taken all you can bear

you call me up

because you know I'll be there

And I'll see your true colors

shining through

I see your true colors

and that's why I love you

so don't be afraid to let them show

your true colors

true colors are beautiful

like a rainbow

Photo by tanakawho

Clean up

2011-08-11T07:04:00.000+10:00

Seeing pictures and hearing people talking about cleaning up their towns and cities has made me proud. Not all of Britain is bad.

Riots

2011-08-10T20:21:00.000+10:00

I am really saddened by what is going on back home in England. Also devastated to see and hear that my adored Manchester was attacked last night.

Firstly I want to say that I hope my family and friends are safe and that their properties are damage free.

I'm not exactly sure of where I stand in terms of who or what is to blame.

Obviously there are many opportunist thugs out there on the streets just looking to rob and destroy whatever they can but there also seems to be a lot of youths out there who are hurting.

Please don't misunderstand, I am not in any way excusing their behaviour, it is so far removed from anything I can comprehend but I cannot help feeling that in some way some one has failed them.

Is it the parents, the teachers, the government, the system?

I've been reading a lot of opinions and can agree partially with both sides of the argument.

I agree that we make our own choices and decisions in life but we can't choose who we are born to or where we are raised. As children others make choices for us. Right or wrong.

My generation is blaming the kids, maybe my generation failed them. Maybe by seeing this coming and leaving the country 10 years ago, I failed them.

RIP

2011-08-03T07:08:00.000+10:00

Goodnight Uncle Jeff. You can rest pain free now.

xxx

Birthday's and Movies

2011-08-01T09:13:00.000+10:00

We celebrated Jon's birthday this weekend. The girls were so excited about it. It's lovely that they get just as much enjoyment out of other peoples birthdays as they do their own.

Jon and I were both pretty sore and tired yesterday, his excesses due to soccer and mine due to my Saturday morning long run so we decided a trip to the movies might be nice.

On the way, we were discussing when was the last time we had been to the movies as a whole family. Can you believe never?

We were going to see Mr Popper Penguins until we realised that Jim Carrey was in it. I can't stand him, and I really don't think I could have managed a full movie. We looked at Captain America and found that IMDB has rated it PG - 13 and the parental guide didn't look too bad. A few scary bits but for my girls who are major Dr Who fans, probably ok. But - the cinema has it rated M.

M or Jim Carrey. Sorry to say but Mr Popper's Penguins was never in with a chance.

Captain America it was. Vmax and 3D. The girls loved it, though didn't really understand it. For me, it was ok. Vmax was nice and I only got nauseous twice from the 3D.

Baskin Robbins afterwards for icecream and home for a roast beef dinner and birthday cake.

RIP

2011-07-17T20:54:00.000+10:00

The downside of having a large extended family is that as they age, bad news comes with almost every phonecall home. At least that's how it's been for the last 4 months.

My dad had 88 first cousins, who all married and most had several children which makes for a very large family. We obviously are not really close to them all but we are to many and at the end of the day in our family, "family is family".

Another family member has passed away, sadly from asbestosis, the same condition that my uncle has.

The treatment that we were hopeful of for my uncle has failed and he is declining quickly. He starts another treatment next week.

Gran had a fall trying to escape from her nursing home and broke her hip, she has just had a hip replacement. She fell again trying to escape the hospital and had to have another surgery. She didn't look like she would pull through but they found out she was anaemic and have treated that. She has improved and she should be back at the nursing home this week.

She no longer knows who I am and gets upset trying to remember. The best I can do now is to write and on better days, my family will read her my letters.

Not a positive post, I know. I am having difficulty finding a positive tonight. I'll try again tomorrow.

Good idea at the time

2011-07-14T20:54:00.000+10:00

I didn't have a partner at kickboxing last night, actually, I deliberately held back in the hope that I would get the trainer. When you box with the trainer, you don't have to hold the pads so you get to do double the session. I thought it was a good idea at the time.

I had a great session, was totally exhausted and felt on top of the world.

Today, during my weights session, I was thinking that maybe it wasn't such a good idea, and now having walked around the shops for 4 hours and lead my own group class tonight, I am pretty sure it was not a good idea!

Would I do it again?

Without a doubt. :-D

The Money Tree

2011-07-11T12:54:00.001+10:00

A little one of these would be nice right now. I don't need a huge one, just a small one to keep me going.

Travel Bug

2011-07-08T13:15:00.001+10:00

I think I caught a Travel Bug when I was in tropical Cairns.

Ever since I got back, I've been thinking of all the places I want to see. A lot of these places I used to think about before I had children. I'm sure when the mummy hormones kick in, they include a huge dose of Travel Bug anti-biotics because I haven't thought of these places for a long time.

I would love to go to Russia, Prague, Canada, Alaska, Singapore, Hong Kong even back to the UK to see my family.

Jon didn't come home for lunch today, it appears that he is at the Pharmacy getting another course of Travel Bug anti-biotics. We're not going anywhere for a while. :(

Good job Sydney summer is on it's way! :)

My lines tell my story

2011-07-07T13:38:00.000+10:00

I don’t spend much time in front of the mirror looking at myself, with three children it’s just not a priority to spend a long time there. However, over the last few months when I am there, drying my hair, I have to admit that the lines on my face were starting to bother me a little bit.

I’m getting older, obviously, but I was starting to think about how I would age, would I look older than my years? I guess getting copious amounts of emails from deal of the day type websites offering many a treatment to preserve my youth was not helping.

Today though, I felt different. Today I celebrated 16 years of marriage to my fantastic husband (I really should tell him more often that I think he is amazing).

Today I have been thinking of the day we got married and about our time together when we were younger and before we had children.

In front of the mirror I started to see those lines in a different way.

My lines tell my story.

My lines explain

that I have been happily married for 16 years
that I have 3 beautiful children
that my son is nearly 12 and turning into an amazing young man just like his dad
how many broken nights sleep I had when I had the joy of breastfeeding each one of them
all friendships I have enjoyed and the late night parties (obviously in the past now)
the trips away to remote cottages with friends and lying on the grass looking up at the stars and singing loudly to Oasis until the stars disappeared and the sun began to rise
the countries I have been lucky enough to visit
the stress and worry that my extended family have caused, though I am still blessed to have them in my life
the wrong decisions I have made and the lessons I have learned from them
the countless hours spent waiting in Doctor’s surgery’s because my child is unwell again
that I lived and loved the 80’s and everything about them
that I watched Charles and Diana get married on live TV

My lines show that I have lived a wonderful life, that I have wisdom and maturity and experience and without my lines I am just a 20 year old with a minimal life story to tell.

How dull would that be?

Happy Anniversary

2011-07-07T11:37:00.000+10:00

16 years ago today on the beautiful Caribbean Island of Barbados I married the most important person in my life.

My gorgeous husband

With my dad

Family and friends

I am pretty sure I love him even more now than I did then. xx

I am grateful for.....

2011-07-06T12:42:00.001+10:00

I am grateful that my children are in holiday club this week and lunch is provided. As a result of this I am extremely grateful that I do not need to make 15 sandwiches this week.

This weeks run!

2011-07-04T12:13:00.003+10:00

This week I felt better prepared mentally for my Saturday morning run. I'd told myself all the right things

You're doing it for you and no one else
You are improving every week
Just give it a go
You can do it

When I got there, my trainer had hurt his ankle and couldn't do the run. Instead he sent us on our 4km time trial, a whole two weeks earlier than we were supposed to do it, apparently! I had no idea, this was the first time I had heard of it.

I knew that the park we train at, or rather start from is exactly 4km if you run two laps, and it is more undulating than hilly so I wasn't feeling too bad about it. I was also beginning to think that feeling a bit flu-y might be in my favour, at least I could improve next time. See always the positive!!

Then he told us the route. And guess what - it wasn't 2 laps of the park, it was half the park and then up a massive hill and then on the way back, up another massive hill (conveniently avoiding acknowledgement of any down hill bits here).

Off I went, keeping up with the front pack until my shoelace came undone and I had to re-tie it. From then on I was playing catch up.

The result, I ran 4km quicker than I have ever done before (when not on a treadmill). Of course there is still room for improvement but I am pretty proud of my efforts.

When we had all finished, there happened to be 30 minutes of the class left. No early mark? Nope! SPRINTS!! 25 minutes of SPRINTS!! My legs are so sore.

I did manage a slow 4km run today though. Must be crazy! :-)

So ok, that wasn't the actual hill, but it was close - honest!

Choices

2011-07-01T12:19:00.003+10:00

One of the things that I have tried to teach my children is that we work hard not to get great exam results or to be top of the class but to have choices.

I want them to be able to choose how to live their lives. At the moment my son seems to think he wants to work 2-4 hours a week and own a couple of porches!!

Well Callum took me at my word and is now in the very, I was going to say lucky, but it's not luck that got him here, it was hard work and dedication. He's in the position where he has been offered a place at a Selective High School, he's been invited to interview for a scholarship at a private school and still have the option of two local high schools.

The choices that Jon and I now have to make about our son's future are pretty tough. There are pros and cons for each school.

We had a meeting with his teacher this morning that provided a little more clarity but we are still not 100%.

I'm not sure I like choices anymore.

Do you think you’d make a good president?

2011-06-29T07:40:00.000+10:00

Would I be a good president or prime minister or Queen is the blog of the day from wordpress.

Probably not would be my answer, I change my mind too much! Or is that what prime ministers and politicians do?

Seriously, I am so far removed from politics that I would be completely useless as it.

Queen, well that's another thing altogether. If you consider being Queen just as a ruler who can make up any rules she likes then maybe. I'd do all sorts of things that are good for humanity. Do I sound like a beauty queen contestant?

Really though, there is no way I could cope with all the pomp and ceremony around being a queen or a royal. Nor could I deal with all the intrusion from the media. And for that matter I wouldn't want to be famous either.

I guess the conclusion here is that I am pretty happy with the life that I have. :-)

When was the last time you changed your mind?

2011-06-27T11:20:00.000+10:00

When was the last time you changed your mind?

This is the post of the day from (21 June 2011) www.dailypost.wordpress.com

I change my mind all the time. I am pretty sure it is for me also a form of procrastination and definitely a trait of my perfectionism. but that's another post.

The most recent thing is in relation to my business. I am changing direction slightly or rather expanding, but the specifics of the change of mind are all in relation to the website and business structure.

Do I merge the two businesses or keep them separate? Do I have a new business name of leverage off the current name. Do I have one website or two separate sites? Or maybe three. A header company and then two for the two business streams.

Still not made my mind up. I thought I had but I haven't. That is what I am supposed to be working on now instead of stockpiling posts because I am so bad at posting if I don't stockpile them and write while I'm on a roll, I might not post again for 3 months - or more....

Patience

2011-06-26T13:08:00.003+10:00

My kids have been performing 'magic' tricks with a deck of cards recently. It's been quite hilarious to watch them trying to pull the wool over our eyes with their 'magic'.

I was sat this morning having my cup of tea and the cards were on the table beside me. It took me back to when I was a child and was taught to play patience by my dad with a deck of cards.

I wondered if Tamzin was old enough to learn. We sat down together and I showed her how to play. Initially she was saying I don't get it, I don't understand and she started to get a bit frustrated. I asked her just to sit and watch for a while and she would pick it up.

She did. I really enjoyed this time with her. I enjoyed being able to show her something from my past and something that didn't involve a computer or Wii or DS.

Most of all though, I enjoyed watching her show her little sister how to play. The two of them side by side on a Sunday morning playing patience was beautiful.

Get on with it

2011-06-25T09:01:00.001+10:00

My run was hard today. Mentally and physically.

When I was rudely awakened this morning, I had no idea where I was (not that I am usually anywhere else other than my bed) what day it was or why there was a loud alarm type noise in my bedroom.

However I quickly remembered that it meant it was time to get up for my run class.

From that point until we were stretching afterwards, the negativity in my mind was relentless. For those of you who have children, imagine that your child is at you non stop, whingeing about everything. Well that child was in my head for an hour.

I can’t do this
It’s too hard
I’ll never make it up that hill
I wonder if I can switch to another class
Why am I doing this?
I’m not a runner
What, another hill
...and you want me to do it twice
Only half way there
Still 10 minutes to go

The point here is that we all have days like this.

During the run I didn’t realise that the positive in me was winning this little internal battle, but it did win.

I finished the run and I will be there again next week to do it all over again!

Cairns

2011-06-24T11:01:00.000+10:00

Our trip to Cairns was very welcome. Although Jon had just started a new job, we needed the break.

This trip was booked in December, between Christmas and New Year actually and we managed to fly the 5 of us to Cairns and stay for a week in a 4 star hotel for $16.

We used a voucher for the flights and our Trendwest membership for the accommodation.

The voucher had so many restrictions on it that we never thought we would be able to use it but, for 2 days in December Qantas had a sale and it worked out perfectly for us.

We booked the trip to come after Callum's scholarship and selective high school exams, we didn't know at the time that Jon would be just starting a new job.

Cairns is beautiful.

It was not like I had expected though. The landscape is unbelievable. I knew that Rainforest was up there but I expected it to be a long drive. I never expected Rainforest to meet the beach.

The waterfalls were amazing, even though it hadn't rained for 7 weeks.

There weather was perfect shorts and T-shirt weather.

The water was 23 degrees.

Jon didn't take a work Blackberry.

I didn't have to get up at stupid o'clock.

We could both have a beer at the Tavern next door and not have one of us driving.

We ate fantastic tasting bananas for a reasonable price. ($14.99 in Sydney at the moment.)

We snorkeled on the Great Barrier Reef.

We didn't get stung.

We didn't cook.

We could all have to eat whatever we wanted every night.

Not much washing up.

I didn't do any laundry.

We rode the cable car up the mountain.

We came down again on a train.

We had the most amazing fudge from Kuranda markets.

The Sydney airport shuttle bus didn't make us wait.

The ash cloud didn't affect our trip.

The 5 of us had a ball.

Tough times (warning long post - sorry)

2011-06-22T09:44:00.003+10:00

I don't think I'm a negative person at least I try not to be - so when things get tough, I look for the positive or just keep myself to myself. This goes part of the way to explaining my absence and to why I stayed away from various forums.

I don't go looking for the sympathy vote.

However now that things have settled I feel I can talk/write about them.

When Jon left his job it was without a doubt the right thing to do. He needed to and our family needed it too.

The time off gave us time to reflect as a family and work out what was important. However, the job market at that time was very slow and while we had to some savings to keep us going for a while, after 3 months, we really needed him to earn an income probably by finding a job.

We found that not only was the job market slow, but that the level of salaries had fallen and they were not matching the position.

During this time, we had a pool built (we had already financially committed to this) and if anyone has done it, you will know that it comes with many stresses. I am so thankful that Jon was home to deal with all of this. For 4 months we had people in our back yard on an almost daily basis.

To add to my worries, I got a facebook message from my sister saying hey, how are you, we should talk soon. Ok, fine. Then when I didn't immediately, a text saying, are you up, can I call you? Now starting to think something is up, surely she couldn't be pregnant again.

I called her, a bit of chit chat and then I heard her take a deep breath and I knew something bad was coming, she said she had something to tell me, Dad was sick and was in hospital, he'd had a stroke. At that point, it felt like my world had fallen apart. My dad, although he has diabetes is fit and strong and young, he is only 57.

All kinds of thoughts were going through my head, firstly I recalled that his dad, my grandad, had died at 58. Then the thoughts of do I need to go back to the UK to see him, should I go back. How can I explain to my children why I'm crying without scaring them.

I never expected my dad to get sick or to really need me (not that he did) I was always concerned for my mum. She is on her own, dad has remarried. I started to question whether living overseas away from my family was the right thing to do. Was I being selfish by choosing to live such a fantastic life here? (As an aside, I realise that that thought was pretty offensive to my family, who says my life is better than theirs.)

I hung up from my sister and told Jon what had happened. He went straight away to call my Dad's wife. More bad news. Not in terms of Dad's health thankfully, but it was Dads news and private to him so I won't share it here.

So, what next?

I kept in touch with my sister and within a few days Dad was fine. He went from bad to fine so quickly. It was almost like it never happened. He made a full recovery. I am so thankful for that.

When he came home from the hospital, I called him (obviously) to see how he was. We talked about what could have caused it and what he needs to do now to stay healthy. I suggested that maybe it was stress that brought it on. I got the usual, I don't suffer from stress but maybe the news about Gran and Jeff has been playing on my mind.

More bombshells, I had no idea what he was talking about.

I knew my Gran had Alzheimer's but that it was being managed. We had even laughed in the past (rightly or wrongly, I don't know) about some of her forgetfulness. He told me that she was getting worse quickly and that he didn't know how long she would be able to stay in her own home. He'd been discussing it with his brother and sister and the careworkers.

Gran's not so young anymore but she has always been very fit and very healthy and most importantly since being on her own for 30 years, very independent . Being forgetful was upsetting her greatly and the thought of going into a home was just awful for her.

So that was Gran, what about Jeff (dad's brother, my uncle). Dad said, "Oh, don't you know? I'm sorry Love, he's dying. He has less than 12 months to live."

Jeff has Asbestosis.

While I am obviously very upset at that news I immediately thought of my dad and whether he could have it. I asked where Jeff had got it from and yes, it from a time when he and my dad had worked together. Grandad had also worked there (small town) and he died from lung cancer.

I asked dad was he ok? ie could he have it, is he going to get tested? They had already tested him and he was fine.

Sadly, that wasn't the end. Dad had to have 4 weeks off work. Two weeks into that, Gran had a stroke, well lots actually, within a 48 hour period.

All the while, I am asking, whoever, what have I done to deserve all this bad news. I'm a good person. Why is this happening?

Much more questioning about where I should live. Lectures from my dad saying don't you dare come back, I didn't raise you to look after me. Is Jon going to get a job? Are we going to lose the house? Can I pay for my kids music and dance tuition?

I came to the realisation, that in terms of the UK, I can't change anything. It's happened. All I can do is honour my family by living the most healthy and fulfilling life that I can.

The position today. Gran is not well in terms of her mental state. She could not go home and has now moved to a residential care home.

Dad is back a work and seemingly all good.

Jeff is having treatment and the doctors think they may be able to give him 24 months.

Jon has a job.

We still have a home filled with love and gorgeous children. x

I've got my desk back

2011-06-21T17:32:00.003+10:00

Yesterday I moved Jon's things out of my desk and reclaimed it. I could suggest that the lack of desk is why I've not been posting but that would be a total lie.

Things have moved on for us now. In the last month or so, Jon started work at a company that is less than a 5 minute drive from home.

The money situation is going to be very difficult for us as this role comes with a huge reduction in salary but that is the decision we have made to give us the quality of life we are looking for.

If we need to sell the house and move in the future so be it. In the meantime, we will try and make cuts to our living costs and increase my earnings.

Cutting costs is going to be really difficult for me as we don't have an extravagant lifestyle, except for the activities that our children do. I don't want to have to stop them. We have cut back to the point that they only do what the absolutely love now, unfortunately those are where the highest costs are.

Jon is now able to come home for lunch a couple of times a week. Leave for work at the same time he used to but arrive early. He is home most evenings before 5.30pm and on a couple of days, he picks Miss T up from dancing on his way home which means I don't have to take all the kids out again - and I could be preparing dinner.

We are also very lucky to have just had a week in Cairns, I know, new job and lower income but a holiday in Cairns. I'll leave the explanation for a later post.

Holidays

2011-02-03T14:23:00.002+11:00

Ok - so I'm supposed to be working, and I am working, I have been pretty productive today, but in the back of my mind, well at the front really I have this nagging need to update here.

I am very aware that I committed to 5 times a week and it's been a while. I do have a reason for not posting - for part of the time but again am very aware that the reason was not going to serve me much longer - so here I am!

I'll keep it brief for now and hope that it satisfies the need to post until maybe tomorrow.

We have been away on holiday, though we did get back on the evening before Australia Day.

We went to Port Macquarie and had a fantastic time, though for me it was not relaxing in the slightest. Having 3 children wave hopping and body boarding in the water for hours at a time is not relaxing for a mum, nor was the tennis, the fishing (don't like fishing), the barefoot bowling, it was a challenge trying to get it in between downpours, swimming, walking, surfing, washing (it never ends) etc.

I did partake in a few bottles of wine though in the evenings, well I didn't have to get up at stupid o'clock to train clients. As much as I love them (and I do) I also like a wine occasionally!

Plus the tennis (the Open, not my attempt at it) requires a glass or two I think!

So yes I am now having a well deserved break from the vino and taking part in this years febfast. I am now onto my 4th day of no alcohol - I started a day early. Even I couldn't take another day of wine drinking. I even left just a glassful in the fridge for my last day, but didn't have it. My husband 'helped' me out there and drank it on Tuesday.

That's all for now folks!

See ya soon

Write about one thing you’ve never told anyone and explain why

2011-01-14T07:57:00.002+11:00

This is a suggestion from The Daily Challenge Blog at WordPress

I don't think I have anything that I have never told anyone. I am a very open person and keep very few (if any secrets). I don't spill my whole life to everyone I meet and can be quite private, if that makes sense, but I do talk to those that are close to me. I am selective about who I tell certain things to but not secretive.

Do you find that you have different friends that you tell different things to?

Febfast

2011-01-12T10:00:00.004+11:00

February is close and again this year I am giving up alcohol for the month. I enjoy a glass or two of wine and I like to drink socially but I am very aware of all the youths out there who struggle with drugs and/or alcohol. I also have an 11 year old boy who in the next few years will be exposed to alcohol outside the home and at that time I will have no direct control over how he handles the situation. I do hope however, that what we teach him in the meantime will influence his decisions when the time comes.

By participating in Febfast, I hope to show him, that although his mum likes a glass of wine, she doesn't need it to enjoy herself and that it is no hardship to say no. In fact he also knows that for the last 2 New Years Eve's I have not had a drink and have been the driver, why, because it was more important for me to have a good time with friends that lived a few towns away than to have that drink.

Anyway, I know the timing isn't perfect and that you will already have dug deep to donate to the Queensland floods, but if you could consider helping me to raise money by clicking this link and sponsoring me to stay alcohol free for February I would really appreciate it.

Of course, I would love it if you could join me instead. Alternatively please just spread the word that Febfast exists and maybe more people will sign up for an alcohol free February.

Queensland

2011-01-11T19:16:00.003+11:00

I had a few ideas for posts but given light of the events in Queensland, they seemed inappropriate. Not because they were offensive but I guess they were pretty light hearted and to be truthful my heart is pretty heavy right now.

Not only are these people suffering now but they will continue to struggle for months, maybe years to come. I just want it to be known that my thoughts are with those facing difficult times.

Winter at home

2011-01-11T07:49:00.000+11:00

I was looking through flickr to find a photo that inspired me to write about, then I remembered that my dad had sent a few pictures to me just before Christmas.

Our home town in Northern England had quite a lot of snow recently, so much in fact that roads and schools were closed and the "bin men" couldn't/wouldn't get out to collect the rubbish!

Not only is this picture a reminder of my family and hometown but it also reminds me of my childhood.

See, when I was small, I loved the snow, we built snowmen and had snowball fights, we went to the Abbey to sledge down the amphitheatre, usually on big black bin bags because the sledges broke on the first decent.

I remember the sound of the snow crunching under my feet, catching snowflakes on my gloves as they fell to the ground, seeing that every snowflake was different. I remember coming back into the house with cold wet feet and red cheeks from the cold.

When I got older and started working and driving, the snow was a huge inconvenience. It appeared that it snowed briefly and before you knew it, it had turned to a dirty wet slush and then ice that was dangerous for both drivers and pedestrians. Trying to rush to work on ice was not fun in the slightest.

I love this picture because my dad sent it and because it reminds me of the fun times we had together when I was a child.

Evicted

2011-01-10T08:30:00.001+11:00

I've been kicked out of my office. I finally got rid of the double bed in the spare room and turned it into an office for me.

Too much opportunity for procrastination if I use the family computer in the family room. I can see the dirty floors, the ironing, the dishes.

But, I've been kicked out. The very first day Jon was off from work, he moved in his laptop, his MP3 player and speakers, all of a sudden it was a necessity to buy a new chair 'rolls eyes'. The only time I can gain access these days is if I am bearing a cup of tea and/or food.

I have to change this!!

ps I did ponder over the title of this post given that you know my husband is out or work but then I figured, it could be procrastination so I left it.

pps I still haven't showered or snoozed from the other day, but don't panic, I have post dated these last 2 posts.... oops

Dexter

2011-01-08T14:18:00.000+11:00

How cool is Dexter? I love it. I have always enjoyed crime thrillers but got bored with CSI and all those shows, also really really hated the TV adverts.

But... I love Dexter, it has everything and it so much better to watch it on DVD, you don't miss anything, can put it on when you want (even if it's a little too late)!

We don't watch much TV but Dexter is a must.... and House, love that too!

What is your must watch TV program?

Sleep versus goals

2011-01-07T14:09:00.003+11:00

I really should be having a shower and a nap now. After just 4 days back at work, I am staying up until about 11pm, one night was 1am. We were watching the 4th series of Dexter on DVD and as there were only 3 episodes to go, we had to finish it. However, with my job, I don't have the luxury of late starts, my average "get up" time is 5am, some days earlier and some a little later.

It doesn't take much to conclude that I don't get enough sleep.

I wish it was as easy as going to bed earlier but I don't want to. I enjoy spending time with my husband and the only time we get to do that is a few evenings a week, after 9pm-ish.

Daytime snoozes are not usually an option due to the kids being home at 3pm, however this afternoon, I have no clients, I have done my training, made muffins with the girls, so afternoon tea is taken care of - therefore I should be sleeping, but no - because I committed to blogging more frequently.

There done for today, I'm off for a shower and a snooze - wish me luck (probably regarding the snooze not the shower) :)

Something that makes me smile

2011-01-05T13:25:00.000+11:00

My children have the ability to stress me out, disappoint me and drive me crazy. They make me angry, they are majorly time consuming but at the end of the day (sometimes literally) they are the loves of my life and the most simple act by them can put a huge smile on my face.

Of course I am proud of them, they really are great children, they are beautiful and intelligent, they are kind and caring, they are child like but can behave like grown ups. Yet they can still drive me crazy.

They are untidy and leave the house a mess, they roll their eyes if I dare to ask them to pick up a toy or put a plate in the dishwasher or tell them to get off their computer, ipod, wii, PlayStation, to turn off the TV.

But I smile when

I hear them laughing
they play together
they sing the wrong words to a song
they help each other
they seek my hand to hold
I find a picture they have drawn of me with I Love Mummy written on it
they get their words confused
they sit on my knee
they flutter their eyes and I am jelly
they touch my hair
they say I look pretty
they think I have lost them in a store and they catch my eye and smile because they know they are safe with me
they tell a joke that doesn't work
they are sleeping

Twelve nights

2011-01-04T10:39:00.003+11:00

For many this goal for 2011 will sound very lame, for me it will be a huge challenge but one that I am ready to face.

The goal - Twelve Nights out in 2011.

I guess that roughly equates to one night a month, which to me sounds difficult (when will I find the time?) though twelve nights from 365 is more than achievable.

To be more specific that is 12 nights out with company. As much as I love going to concerts with my husband the goal is to interact with people outside of my immediate family.

For financial reasons, (ie a babysitter costing a fortune) it may be that I go out on my own with girlfriends while Jon looks after the kids but I'm sure on occasion we can both go out with a group of friends.

Rules - it must be fun! It must not involve sitting around a dinner table with "friends" complaining about their lives, partners or discussing horrific stories in the media.

I will need to be selective I think.

Welcome to 2011

2011-01-01T17:47:00.002+11:00

I have tried many times in the last year to write here regularly with little success. I have many ideas of what to write about when I am out and about but when it comes to sitting down and writing, my mind goes blank or to be honest I can't be bothered.

In my defence 2010 has also been a pretty big year for me. On the plus side my business has grown and has provided us with the much needed extra income, however that hasn't come without a cost.

Towards the end of last year it became clear that whilst I love what I do it was taking over my life completely. It didn't help that Jon's role at work was also becoming more demanding of his time and attention.

The result was that neither of us had any energy left to focus on ourselves, each other, our children (other than doing what needed to be done) or our future.

We realised this a few months ago and made the decision that this had to change. This is easier said than done when you are in the middle of it.

Now Jon and I may not have been in the same room much for the last 6 months but it seems we were still on the same page.

I signed on with a new business coach and my goals are to grow the business while providing a balance with the rest of my life and Jon resigned from his job in mid December.

He doesn't have a job to go to and we are not sure whether going back to a high pressured job is the way to go for him (despite the fact that he is very good at what he does).

Jon is very motivated and very driven and in the 10 days or so between the resignation and Christmas eve, he set up a business, is in discussions to go into partnership with another business and is applying for jobs.

This should be a scary time for us. We have a huge mortgage and big monthly expenses with all the activities we provide for our children, but we are not afraid. For both of us it feels like things are exactly as they should be.

This post was supposed to be about how I would find something to write, it seems it wasn't that difficult after all.

Anyway, some of my facebook friends are taking daily photographs and some blog friends are writing daily blogs with the help of http://dailypost.wordpress.com/

I will try and post something 5 days a week. I can't promise 7, I am after all looking for balance, though I have a feeling I may find it here.....

Formatting

2010-02-28T10:42:00.001+11:00

Please excuse the formatting with my last post(and many previous posts). Blogger drives me crazy sometimes.

Febfast

2010-02-28T10:23:00.006+11:00

Today is the last day of my alcohol fast. I have been doing a sponsored alcohol fast with Febfast.

This is what they do :-

“We work to reduce the impact of alcohol and other drugs on young Australians by raising funds to support organisations working in research, prevention and service delivery concerning alcohol and other drugs use by young people.”

I looked at their website in January and followed the links to the various charities they support and have to say I was moved by what they do and also disturbed by how young, children (yes children) are being affected by drugs and alcohol.

I know my son is approaching the tweens and is not too far off his early teens. I have to say it does comfort me somewhat to know that organisations that can support both youths and their families are out there.

I don’t feel I drink excessively but that doesn’t matter. It’s the perceptions of our children that matter. Unfortunately CJ seems to think that Jon and I drink a lot, though when we ask him to seriously think about it, he realises we don’t – but what discussions are happening in the playground between their friends. Do they perceive that us as parents are drinking and lot and that that is ok. This is before we get onto talking about drugs.

Last weekend we went as a family to a BBQ, the day after I commented to my son about how much I enjoyed it. His reply was, "Even though you didn't drink". I am glad I did this fast. It really wasn't a hardship but I hope to have shown my son that you don't have to drink to have a good time.

The event ends today but if anyone would like to sponsor me they can do that here.

Good or bad?

2010-02-23T20:29:00.001+11:00

Miss T aged 6, was taught today at school about 'Good Foods' and 'Bad Foods'.

What happened to not attaching emotional labels to food?

Then the Dr gave her a lollipop when she had her swine flu vacc - a few hours after she had a filling at the dentist!

Idols

2010-02-11T13:57:00.001+11:00

You may already have seen this on the email, but it made me smile, it was sent to me by my sister.

Find out who truly is your role model. Mine was Gandhi.
DON'T SCROLL DOWN YET!!

FIRST, do the simple math below,
THEN, scroll down to find your hero.

It's CRAZY how accurate this is!
1) Pick your favorite number between 1-8
2) Multiply by 3 then
3) Add 3
4) Then again Multiply by 3 (I'll wait while you get the calculator.....)
5 ) You'll get a 2 digit number.....maybe 42.

6 ) Add the digits together. Example 4 and 2 = 6
Now Scroll down
...................

With that number, see who your ROLE MODEL is from the list below:
1. Albert Einstein
2. Oprah Winfrey
3. Mother Theresa
4. Ronald Reagan
5. Bill Gates
6. Gandhi
7. Eleanor Roosevel

8. Babe Ruth

9. Cherub/Claire

10. Winston Churchill

11. Barbara Walters
12. Dali Lama

I know...I just have that effect on people...One day you, too, can be like me....Believe it!

P.S. Stop picking different numbers!! I AM YOUR IDOL, JUST DEAL WITH IT!!!!!!

Our dog

2010-01-14T11:20:00.002+11:00

Our dog has had to leave us. She has been a challenge from the day we got her. She was a rescue dog, her mother didn't survive the birth of her pups so she was hand raised by the Vet nurses (one being our next door neighbour).

When she was 5 weeks old she got parvo virus and thankfully as she was in the care of a vet nurse she got the treatment she needed very quickly. We brought her home when she was recovered at about 7 weeks old.

She has always been a bit biteish (a word invented by my kids) but she has been getting worse. She knocked my 6 year old daughter over, stood over her and bit her face. That was the final straw for me but it took me a week or so to actually do something about it. Out of courtesy to my neighbour I wanted to speak to her first. Unfortunately she was away and wouldn't be back before our holidays.

Winnie was going to be looked after for us while we were on holiday by a family friend but she has small children and I was too scared to put them at risk. So I called one of the Vet nurses, who wasn't surprised to hear from me (my neighbour had been letting her know what was going on). She took the dog back right away and has found Winnie a new home with a couple without children.

My kids - well I have told them that she has gone to do some intensive training and provided she passes she will come home. I will tell them soon that she has had to go to someone else.

I feel bad about it but mostly I feel relieved that my kids can play outside without being bitten.

Beautiful Blogger Awards

2010-01-11T17:39:00.003+11:00

Thanks Kristy for tagging me.

7 things you don't know about me.

1. I am a Chartered Tax Advisor and have worked for "both sides", as a tax agent and as a tax investigator, though I haven't practiced tax since 2003.

2. Jon and I got married in Barbados. We took a few close family members and friends with us and then had a big party for everyone else when we got back home.

3. Each of my 3 children were born in different countries and have different passports, England, New Zealand and Australia.

4. I have been identified several times by people I have never met before, just by my eyes. Apparently they are exactly the same as my fathers and grandfathers. Freaked me a bit at the time but now I think it's pretty cool.

5. My first car was a pink Citroen Dyane. Just like this one but my dad painted it pink for me. Yes it is a "convertible". I loved it and Jon was so proud to be seen it it!

6. I luuuurrrrved Jon Bon Jovi until very recently. I saw picture of him recently and he now looks a bit erm - "plastic". Think I need to reserve judgement and do a bit more research!!

7. I once slept through a Metallica concert.

I am pretty sure everyone has done this already but if not, I look forward to reading about you.

Memories and Millionaires

2010-01-05T10:26:00.009+11:00

Was just browsing the web this morning catching up on emails and blogs and got distracted with flickr.com.

I found this picture that reminded me of my childhood.

Picture by renown

Sunny days, the bus at the Town Hall taking passengers over the bridge to the beach at Bigger Bank. The Bingo Hall in the background. The picture was taken around 1980 when I was living in the town so has big memories for me.

I am also reading a book at the moment about a student nurse training in North Lonsdale Hospital in the 60's. This is probably what sent me off on a tangent looking for pics of home.

I also watched the episode of 'The Secret Millionaire" that I missed. It was in my home town and actually the run-down flats that the secret millionaire had to live in was in the same street that I was raised in for my first 5 years of life.

They don't paint a pretty picture of my home town at all. It is pretty bleak but not as bleak as that. Most of my family still live there, actually the only ones that don't left before we did.

It was an eye-opener though for my son to see where his dad and I lived and grew up.

Happy New Year

2010-01-01T00:10:00.000+11:00

Losing weight

2009-12-31T13:04:00.002+11:00

How interesting is that?

Nowhere in that long list of goals is losing weight. I was sweeping the floor when I realised that. With three children a shiny clean house doesn't last long.

However, even in a list of 'off the top of my head' goals, losing weight wasn't there and it's not that I couldn't stand to lose a kilo or two, I am 100% sure I could but, do I need to? Will that make me happy? Has my unconscious mind finally learnt that losing weight is not a goal but a result of achieving some of the other goals? Maybe it has.

Feeling so much better & goals

2009-12-31T12:03:00.004+11:00

Yeah! I am feeling heaps better today, which is good as we have visitors arriving this afternoon. My neck is still causing me grief but it doesn't bother me as much today.

I haven't yet decided what to do about tonight's party. I have been considering for some time being the designated driver. That way I will still feel good tomorrow. But, I love a good party and I will be honest, I like having a drink at parties.

I've been thinking about what my goals are for the coming year. There are so many things I would like to achieve, such as

having a regular training program

eating a healthy diet

take my supplements

not bingeing

cooking healthy meals for my family every day and at every meal time

increasing my number of clients

taking on trainers to work with me

taking the kids on an overseas holiday

visiting my family in England

putting a pool in the backyard

mediating regularly

drinking more water

having a bit more 'me' time

becoming a more positive person

accepting me for who I am now

living my life now - not later

living in the moment

learning to trust myself

learning to trust others

keep my house tidy

keep my house clean

keep on top of household filing

I think I need to stop there.

There are so many goals and I haven't reviewed them yet but I am pretty sure that by achieving just a few of them, I will either achieve them all or many will become irrelevant.

I don't need to decide on my goals today in preparation for tomorrow - The New Year - I have 12 months to achieve them - but nor will I procrastinate. I will pick two or three and focus on them for a period of time, once they become a habit, I will add more goals.

One think I need to continue to work on is my all or nothing attitude, this has held me back on my goals for so many years. I am improving and I will continue to do so.

OK - I have decided that to start with I am going to take my supplements daily and I am going to drink (at least) one glass of water with every meal.

I really dislike the physical aspect of taking supplements so I will get a small container that I can keep with me and take them throughout the day. If I take more than 2 at a time I feel physically sick. In the past I have decided to spread them out through the day but usually forget. This way, I can have them with me and take them with that glass of water, wherever I am.

Feeling sorry for myself

2009-12-30T10:45:00.004+11:00

OMG - here I was thinking that I am a positive person most of the time and was just dropping in to say how sorry I was feeling for myself and then I saw that yesterday was a complaint too.

I think I need to have a close look at myself.

Anyway, I feel yuck, I have been feeling yuck since the 27th, in fact I missed a party on the 27th because I felt yuck. On a positive note I could have gone, but didn't want to eat or drink or have to constantly explain myself so I chose not to go.

At first I thought I had a food and alcohol hangover even though I didn't think I had had that much, but now I don't think it can be. I have a nauseous feeling, sore throat, drippy nose and any inclination to do anything has definitely left the building. To make it worse I have woke up with a restriction in my neck, not too much and normally it wouldn't bother me too much - but today it does.

Whinge whinge whinge I am boring myself.

On a positive note, the cleaning fairies visited my house yesterday (they were v expensive, but worth it) my house is sparkling. One exception though, that I have to deal with, my stainless steel cooker and the ignition knobs are now a dirty gold/bronze colour. I hope it is not totally ruined but something the cleaners used did not agree with my cooker. And, the little markers that tell me which hob is which have been removed.

But the rest of my house is clean - and all at the same time.

Today I am drinking lots of water and trying to figure out what I need more, training or sleep.

Blogging

2009-12-29T09:37:00.003+11:00

Quick complaint - blogger is driving me crazy. I really dislike (would say hate but don't like that word) the formatting.

As I spend so much time hanging around waiting for children to finish various activities, I decided to get an Eee pc and use that time constructively by working and writing.

I didn't think I needed to be online, I would draft documents in Word and then copy them into the appropriate format - but blogger doesn't like that.

I have looked at wordpress and different problems occur mostly related to me being new at it.

Which do you prefer and any quick and easy tips?

Basically - ME!

2009-12-11T09:51:00.003+11:00

This is what happened when I entered my blog address in Wordle. Very interesting.

Love this Katie. Thank you.

I feel strange.......

2009-12-09T08:11:00.002+11:00

I have a funny feeling in my tummy.

It's a Wednesday morning and the day didn't get off to a very good start. This morning was the first time I have ever missed a client session and it was because I slept in. I could say my alarm didn't go off but I take full responsibility for not setting it correctly. I woke up at 6am exactly which is the time I start my session 30 minutes from home. My clock said 6 PM and the alarm was set for 4.41 AM. Hence it didn't work.

I phoned my client and apologised profusely and told her the next session is on me. (Part of our contract)

Then, Jon has taken the day off work to take our youngest daughter out for a special 'Dad and Daughter' day before she starts school next year. She thinks she is going out for a milkshake but dad is taking her on the train and ferry to Taronga Zoo. She has been there before but she was too young to appreciate it. She will love it and I think he will too.

The funny feeling - I miss her, I know she is a preschool for 2 days every week but not on a Wednesday and I feel strange, I feel like something is missing. I am now thinking about how I will feel next year when I drop all 3 of them at school. The school will have the majority of my family.

So today, I have a Wednesday to fill, it is not my usual routine, I have heaps to do but it feels different!

Well done - positive reinforcement

2009-12-08T07:20:00.003+11:00

I’ve been reading a few blogs recently and quite a people out there are trying to do the ‘Intuitive Eating’ thing.

I found this ‘idea’ a few years ago and have been trying to live by it. I say ‘trying’ as it is not easy to do. If it was easy, then all of us with eating issues would read a book or a blog and just do it. Oh I wish!

I am also a big believer in being kind to yourself, looking for the positive in everything you do or that happens to you, even if it is just the lesson learned. Again, this is not always easy; in fact it’s downright hard, especially when it is preceded by many years of not being kind to yourself.

I have just read the phrase ‘positive reinforcement’. I don’t even know what the context of this phrase was but that’s not the point here, the point here is that as a mother of 3 children aged 10, 6 and 4 and the owner of a pretty full on puppy, positive reinforcement has been a big feature in my life for the past 10 years.

So, it got me thinking. Every day I praise the good behaviour in my children, especially when there is very little good behaviour, because I believe they will learn to get the reaction from me that they want. They will continue with the good behaviour and try and refrain from the bad.

Yesterday, walking the dog, she was a nightmare, I mean, my arm hurt from her pulling, my hands were red raw from holding the lead so tightly and I seemed to be using my ‘firm’ voice a lot.

This morning reading the ‘positive reinforcement’ phrase made me think about a walk a few days ago where she behaved really well. I didn’t wait until some time later to acknowledge her good behaviour, I didn’t say good girl – just the once. The whole walk (well except where it was dangerous to) I maintained eye contact with her and repeated the whole walk, ‘good girl, good girl, good girl. She knew I was happy with her. She didn’t need a ‘treat’. She needed, I believe the positive reinforcement. Still the next walk was not good, but I will continue and she will learn.

The point – what difference would it make if every time, we did something good, we praised ourselves, every little thing and at the time, not later in a journal but at the time. I understand looking in a mirror and repeating good girl over and over may not always be practical but a little acknowledgement in your mind I think could be helpful.

This isn’t just about the food; it’s about the self esteem. For example, if you handled a situation well, or in some cases, even just handled it because you have been putting it off for so long because it was outside of your comfort zone, acknowledge that, give yourself praise, ignore the bad, the something you could have said or done better, as you would with a 4 year old. I wouldn’t focus with my daughter on the one little thing that she could have done better, I would focus on the 15 great things she did.

And now I have got to the end of writing this, I realize that this technique is something psychologists have been trying to teach us for years.

The stolen Christmas

2009-12-06T09:45:00.003+11:00

I really feel this year like Christmas has been stolen from me by my children.

I no longer have a part in it. They put the tree up, they are getting big $ value gifts this year, so I haven't done lots of shopping for little gifts, presents for nieces and nephews in England were bought and posted mid year. I guess also not working for a big employer so no Christmas parties, and of course being away from the cold may be starting to have an effect, The first eight years of Christmas in the sun could have been a novelty. Or maybe it is just this year and next year will be different again.

I don't feel "bah humbug" far from it I love Christmas but I don't feel like it belongs to me anymore.

I'm sure I will feel better in the next couple of weeks when I see the Children's Christmas concerts.

Regardless, Merry Christmas everyone and I hope your preparation are well on the way.

Friends to visit

2009-11-17T21:23:00.003+11:00

I did however take a break from work this weekend to spend it with Kristy.

Kristy arrived on Thursday and stayed with us until Sunday evening. She is a very beautiful person and is exactly as I imagined her to be. Despite never having met before and only speaking a couple of times on the telephone, we got on really well. It felt like I had known her for years. Well actually I have, but only online.

We did driving, shopping, walking in the Blue Mountains, dance classes (for my girls) coffees, a couple of wines, soccer supporting. Just normal family stuff. I hope it wasn't too boring for Kristy but it was great for me to have a girlfriend around.

I have to say thank you to Kristy's dad for spotting that bargain ticket! Thank you.

Exciting times

2009-11-17T21:09:00.002+11:00

Things have been happening recently. I realised a few weeks ago that we were heading towards the middle of term 4 and that next year my Kindergarten child would be in year 1, my baby boy would be in year 5 and my last baby is starting school.

What would I do with myself?

Even though I have a PT business I still consider myself a stay at home mum and tell people I haven't worked since my second child was born 6 years ago. I have actually been working for two and a half years albeit before Jon left for work and after he got home, plus preschool days.

Anyhow I was never supposed to be a stay at home mum, I don't consider myself cut out for it or particularly good at it, some mums are and I totally respect that, but I was always destined to work. Perhaps that is why I did both. Childcare for 2 babies just wasn't an option, hence the working when Jon was home.

Now that my youngest is heading to school, I need to either get a 'proper' job or build a 'proper' business. So building a 'proper' business it is.

I am working hard at growing this business, not just stepping out of comfort zones, but leaping out of them at a great height. Much reading and research has been done and procrastination is not allowed anywhere near my personal space.

Part of this process was to finish up with some clients. They were not time efficient and actually were extremely draining which I felt (having been told by many people) was hindering and not helping progression. And actually since doing this new doors have opened already. No rest for the wicked!

Busy and exciting times are ahead.

Parenting

2009-11-02T19:17:00.003+11:00

My son today got his Opportunity Class results and it has opened a whole new can of worms.

We never really intended for him to take up any offer but it would give us an indication of whether we should be considering a Selective High School for him.

He has been struggling for the last few weeks with anxiety. We seem to have pinpointed it to something at school. He is very open with me and I am 100% certain that if there was a problem that he was aware of he would have discussed it with me. He really doesn't know what is causing the symptoms.

The symptoms first appeared a couple of months ago on the morning of his OC test. He was shaking, crying, having palpitations, almost vomiting and could not even look at food. For me and my husband this was heartbreaking, he was 9 years old. No child should have to deal with that.

As a result Jon and I pretty much decided that bright or not, a Selective High School environment would not be for CJ. The competition would be too great and his stress levels would be permanently sky high.

His anxiety has continued (and we are talking to the school about it) so we really played down the OC results. He came home from school today though knowing that other kids had their results and wanted to know what he got.

I asked him first what he wanted the result to be? He said that he didn't want to go but it would be nice to know he could. When he found out his result he burst into tears, for some reason he just didn't think that he was that talented. It came as no surprise to Jon and I but CJ just doesn't get it.

We have a very intelligent boy, who is talented in all areas, he plays in the school band, they won another first place last week, he is teaching himself to play piano and guitar and has asked for a drum kit for Christmas (whole other story). He writes music and lyrics, he mixes and produces it on his computer. His dance group did very well this year, he is class captain etc etc.

And I know I am biased but the point of this is I guess that being a parent is so hard.

With a little pushing he could be an amazing academic - but it could also break him.

He could pursue his music - but should it stay a hobby?

Do we butt out and let him make his own decisions - at 10 is he old enough to do that? Would that make me a neglectful parent?

Babies are so much easier than growing children and I have two others following not so far behind him!

Why is it....

2009-11-02T19:11:00.002+11:00

.....that camping for one night is really too much hassle and any more than 2 nights is way too long!

This trip was a huge improvement on the previous trips - there were no vomiting children and it didn't rain.

Actually apart from the not sleeping very much at all, it was good. We only travelled about 20 minutes down the road to Lane Cove National Park, but it felt like I was a million miles away from home.

We went for a short walk by the river on Sunday morning but the girls really struggled with it. Miss T usually walks (runs) for miles but she just wasn't up for it and when that happens we know it is time to turn back.

I think given that I have not vowed to never go again - it can be determined a success.

Off camping

2009-10-31T08:57:00.003+11:00

"Off camping" could be interpreted 2 ways

1 We are off camping today with the kids and looking forward to a good time.

2 I am off camping after last time.

At this stage, I am not sure which camp - ha ha, I fall into. I am trying to be in camp number 1.

Went out for a run this morning, but do you know what, I just couldn't run more than about 200m at a time, so I did a slow version of interval training but my heart rate still got up there.

I'm not going to stress about why, some days it's just like that. I've been sick, not eating right, tired, humid. who cares - I did an hour and I was outside getting hot and sweaty. There's always next time.

Long time......

2009-10-30T15:35:00.003+11:00

It's been a while, but today I want to say I am in a really good place.

I don't know why, I just am. The sun is shining, I got some work done, I took our puppy to the park and did I say the sun is shining.

I've not been in a bad or a low place but I have been in a nothing place.

Life has been good and I have heaps to be thankful for.

I think however there has been stress, sadness, worry, unhappiness in the lives of people around me and I think that may have made me a bit neutral.

Anyway, today is GOOD!!!

Where am I?

2009-09-18T15:46:00.003+10:00

I know it's been a while, unfortunately I still don't have any inspiration to write. We are all well, busy and trying to work on moving forward in all aspects.

I am reading everyone's blogs but again inspiration to comment is not strong. Thinking about you all though.

Be kind to yourself. x

Birthdays and training

2009-08-04T11:03:00.003+10:00

Didn't think I was going to fit my training in today. I was prepared to forfeit it in favour of being at home this morning when my son woke up to celebrate his 10th birthday.

But, I managed to squeeze it in after I got the kids on the school bus and before I took my little one to her swimming lesson.

I also managed a bit of a peek on face book and a couple of emails to Kristy, who is doing fantastically well at the moment.

CJ had a good morning, seemed very happy with his presents, unfortunately he has a UNSW English test this morning, (and and OC test tomorrow) but we are heading out for Mexican this evening, his choice, so that should end the day on a high for him.

10 today

2009-08-04T09:35:00.001+10:00

Happy Birthday my beautiful 10 year old boy.

Love ya loads xx

Implants

2009-08-03T21:03:00.002+10:00

Our God-daughter was today, at 7 months old, the youngest baby ever to have bi-lateral cochlear implants.

She is doing well, the doctors are pleased with the surgery. We are all very relieved it is over, especially her mum who has been amazing through this journey. She gets them switched on in 2 weeks and will then hear her very first sounds.

With 3 older brothers - will she regret it?

Nah - I don't think so!

Recover well, gorgeous girl. xx

Go the Warriors

2009-08-01T15:46:00.002+10:00

Jon and I have a babysitter, free tickets to the Warriors so we are off out on our own to watch our team play the Panthers tonight.

I am now desperately trying to clean the house so it is respectable for the babysitter to see. If only I didn't have kids, I wouldn't have as much mess, I would have more time to clean and I wouldn't need a babysitter. But then my life would have no meaning. I love them really.

Fancy dress

2009-07-29T11:00:00.004+10:00

We have declined the invitation to the fancy dress party. Partly because it was too hard but mostly because of the cost.

To hire 2 costumes and a babysitter, to pay for parking, tolls, drinks and a present, the whole evening would have ended up costing us upwards of $400. We had to decide if we wanted to go so badly that it was worth that cost. Unfortunately the answer was - no.

That money could buy us 2 or 3 evenings out closer to home, so the decision was made not to go.

Photographs

2009-07-28T15:10:00.001+10:00

When we are on a weight loss/figure changing journey we are told to take photographs because they are a good indication of our changing shape, especially if the scale is not moving as we would like.

However, what happens when, the scale is moving in quite a steep downwards slope, your confidence is sky high, you even stop disliking what you see in the mirror? You are feeling fitter and stronger, your skin is clearer, your clothes are looser and you are getting compliments, but then you see a photograph of yourself and realize that you are nowhere near as far along in the journey as you would like to be or think that you are.

You ignore it and concentrate on the feelings. As with the scale it is only one tool in the box.

Force feeding

2009-07-27T14:32:00.001+10:00

Thankfully my first early get up after a weeks holiday wasn’t too rude an awakening for me. I managed to get up and out on time with no problems, I even remembered to reload the car with equipment last night.

We had a visit to playgroup this morning, I don’t normally go on the first day back as CJ is well and truly over playgroup and schools don’t go back until tomorrow, but as Miss T has only been away from playgroup for 2 terms, I thought it would be nice for her to go back and see some of her old friends. The girls had a great time, and why…..because two of the children were celebrating birthdays this week so the lollies and cakes were more than plentiful.

I was aware of this so I had my little snack of a hard boiled egg before I went. I still find it extremely annoying when other mums try and force feed you sweet stuff (me not the kids) even though I have told them many times that I don’t want that food. I had to decline the stuff more than half a dozen times today. If I wasn’t feeling so motivated I would definitely have caved in. All that caved in this time was her head as I hit it with a blunt instrument – oh no that was all in my mind.

Bondi to Coogee Coastal Walk

2009-07-25T09:12:00.003+10:00

We had such a good day yesterday. Jon had the day off work, the intention was that just the two of us would have a day together, he hadn’t realized that it was the school holidays. Never mind, we had a nice family day out.

First Jon dropped his car at the garage for a service and then we packed a lunch and set off to Bondi. I wanted to do the Bondi to Coogee walk.

When we set off it was so cold, a beautiful day but oh so cold. We soon warmed up as we walked.

We wrote messages in the sand, we watched the surfers, some doing better than others, we ate lunch, watched the Iceberg swimmers, dodged the runners.

Miss C spectacularly fell over in the mud and ended up very cold and covered in mud – she looked so cute when we set off.

The kids rock climbed, I was a nervous mother watching, Miss C climbed very well and then freaked when she turned around and saw how high she was.

We kept on walking and got to the Waverley Cemetery. Some of the graves are amazing, great big massive things, it was sad to see some of them though cracked and broken. I chose to believe it was the sea elements that caused this but I think probably not.

By this stage of the walk the kids were starting to whinge about tired legs so we decided to turn around and walk back.

Jon decided he wanted to head to Bondi Junction to get a donut, obviously the kids loved this idea so off we went.

We couldn’t immediately find a donut shop so the kids had a Golden Arches ice cream instead.

Back in the car, stressful journey home, but made it to the shop to get CJ the new Harry Potter game for the PS2, picked up Jon’s car. Cost less than $500 – bonus and home for dinner.

I even abstained from the takeaway Indian (not that the scales reflected that with a 300g gain this morning, but never mind).

The evening ended perfectly with me falling asleep in front of a movie – not like me at all.

Work ethic

2009-07-23T18:27:00.003+10:00

I overheard Miss T in the back of the car discussing possible careers with her brother this morning. (It's obviously weighing very heavily on her 5 year old mind at the moment.)

She concluded that being a firefighter would be a good job because you get lots of days off because you hardly ever see any fires.

I like her logic - not too sure about her work ethic.

Career

2009-07-22T11:17:00.005+10:00

Miss T today informed me that she would like to be a police lady when she get older. I found this interesting and asked her why, and what she thought a police lady did. Obviously bored with the conversation at this stage said (one of her favourite lines at the moment) "I don't know!"

Her other favourite is, "so?" - I am desperately trying not to rise to this, she has 10 days to get over it before I start challenging her. I find if I ignore phrases or comments they tend to disappear, if I tell her not to speak to me like that, they stick around for a bit longer. Hmmm - strange that!

Movies

2009-07-21T17:06:00.003+10:00

We've had a good day today. I had a long chat with a friend this morning and then I took the kids to the movies to see Ice Age 3. The girls enjoyed it a lot, especially the lollies that I very rarely buy them. CJ thought he was a bit too old (or cool) for it but I'm sure he enjoyed it really.

He didn't enjoy being teased my a school friend?? for carrying a pink bag. He really should have packed the drinks in one of his bags, but maybe he has learnt this lesson now!

Thankfully the queue at McDonald's afterwards was too long so we had to have sushi instead. The girls had a milkshake and a hot dog but didn't eat much of that at all (too many lollies).

I've done the laundry, folded and put it all away. Now I have to think about what to make for everyone for dinner.

Recently I started a food menu for the week for us all, it helped a lot but the last 2 weeks I have been trying to use up what we already have in the freezer or cupboards. We were getting overrun with food. So I have to go digging and make a meal that isn't too mismatched.

Hannah Montanna is on at the drive in $25 a car. I may take the kids to that later in the week.

Fancy dress

2009-07-21T16:41:00.000+10:00

We have been invited to a fancy dress birthday party on 1 August. I am not keen on going into the city, Circular Quay, in fancy dress at all. I know it will be fun after I have consumed a few alcoholic beverages (please Jon don't make me be the safe driver, I know it is your friend really but.....) but it is the planning, the trying on, the hiring and returning of the costumes. Trying to find a costume with 3 kids attached to us will not be fun.

Okay so I'm a spoil sport, but I guess not being comfortable with your size and shape for so many years strikes fear into a girls heart, let alone her fairly conservative brain.

We have no idea what to go as - actually, I think Jon might, but he may have to think again.

Tell me your experiences. On second thoughts only tell me if they are good experiences. I am freaking about it enough as it is.

Catching up

2009-07-20T16:31:00.002+10:00

Today has been a quiet day for us. The kids had a busy week last week and for this week of the school holidays, I have planned for it to be quiet, for me as much as for them.

I so need a break from running around to and from school, work various after school activities. Although this term has been less busy than the first term, due to me cancelling or moving kids activites, with 3 children it is still pretty busy. Not to mention getting up before 5am 6 days a week to train clients or myself.

Having said that, we are all going to the movies tomorrow to see Ice Age 3. My youngest is so looking forward to it. The girls have only been to the movies once before.

My back is feeling so much better. I actually took a backwards step with it over the weekend but it appears to be on the mend now.

Food is going well and the scales are moving downwards, always a plus. My mind is also in a very good spot right now.

I have spent most of the day at the computer catching up on emails to friends and even family that I have neglected for too long, there are still many I need to catch up with including my mam. I will call her soon, by that I mean in the next couple of hours when she gets up. It is early Monday morning for her right now.

My house is still a mess, much work to be done here, but that can wait. We have clean clothes to wear so all is good.

Enjoy your evening.

Walking

2009-07-15T16:06:00.003+10:00

This morning was a rush, I had to get my kids to Holiday Club early this morning as I had a 9am appointment in the opposite direction to get all my moles checked. Thankfully all good. Next appointment in a couple of years.

Last night though was spent rather restlessly wincing in pain as I tried to turn over, forgetting that my back was sore and then listening to the girls coughing. My back is much better today though. I am still not game enough to bend down to tie shoe laces but my youngest and I did have a nice morning walking to the park to play on the playgrounds. I didn't do much playing, I have to admit.

We saw, cars, bikes, dogs, dogs in prams, birds, trees, trees with holes in, trees chopped down, people BBQing and people eating sandwich picnics. We saw kids on skateboards, kids doing tennis lessons, kids screaming, and kids laughing.

Now I need to start dinner and then take CJ to AFL training.

My back hurts

2009-07-14T18:42:00.002+10:00

OMG - my back hurts so bad. I felt it 'go' this morning during training, thankfully I was doing my own training and not with a client. I managed to carry on with a slightly adapted workout and a full day of being a mum, Jon is away, just my luck. Now I am sat on the massage chair hoping for a miracle. Next move is an ice pack.

I like to think positive and focus on it being gone in the morning but in reality, I know it will be about a week of tentative movement and then about 5 days of it easing then, it should be good. Walking, maybe cycling, and slightly lighter upper body training is still on the agenda for the next couple of weeks.

Out though is running and AFL training with CJ, lifting kids and dancing on tables! At least for a little while. Thankfully I don't have too many clients for the next couple of weeks, and I will just have to make those cardio workouts so I don't have to lift and spot heavy weights.

Put our children first

2009-07-11T08:54:00.002+10:00

We had some dramas yesterday with my youngest daughter (4 years old).

I dropped her at her preschool, yesterday was her last day as for the last few weeks I hadn't been happy with the way the preschool was running, they had made staff changes and when I raised my concerns, I was ignored. A place came up from next term at another preschool so she is going to start there.

When we got there yesterday there was a note on the sign in register to say that the usual staff were sick and instead, the owner had brought in her son!!!

I had an appointment and I didn’t know what to do, I left her there but was not comfortable with it. When I got back to the car, I burst into tears. I had left my little girl with 2 people that I had absolutely no confidence in. Why because I had an appointment? I felt like the worst mother.

I called Jon and talked to him, we agreed that I would go right back in and pull her out. So I did. I don't like confrontation so I was going to make up some story about a family emergency and needed to go. But no, firstly I didn't want to tempt fate, secondly, I was so furious that someone had such a lack of respect for our children and that she was more interested in money than safety and thirdly she had made me feel like a bad mother.

I have no idea if her son was a qualified child care worker (but I am pretty sure he wouldn’t be). Had he been cleared to work with children, probably not. How could I leave my precious daughter with those 2?

When I told the owner I was pulling my daughter out, she just said well it’s ok it’s her last day. – What does that mean?

The mayonnaise jar

2009-07-01T19:02:00.001+10:00

The Mayonnaise Jar

When things in your life seem, almost too much to handle,
When 24 Hours in a day is not enough,
Remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class
And had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly,
He picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar
and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students, if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured
them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open Areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively
filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor, as the laughter subsided,
'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things - family,
children, health, Friends, and Favorite passions –
Things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, Your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car.

The sand is everything else --The small stuff.

'If you put the sand into the jar first,' He continued,
'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff,
You will never have room for the things that are important to you.

So...

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play With your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.

There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.

'Take care of the golf balls first --
The things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.'

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled.
'I'm glad you asked'.

It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,
there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.'

Tired

2009-06-29T18:07:00.002+10:00

I am so so tired. I normally don't have any trouble getting up in the mornings (even my 4.30am get ups) but this morning, I was really surprised to hear my alarm. I swear I had just gone to bed. Granted I probably have gone before 11pm with a 4.30am start but never mind. Can't be perfect all the time!!

My son has also been sick so I guess that has taken its toll a little bit. I haven't trained this weekend because I didn't want to leave him so I think my system needs a good shake up. Back into it in the morning. CJ is getting better now, his temperature is coming down. Hopefully he will need only one more day at home.

My shoulder has been playing up a little yesterday and today, I am hoping it is just cross because I upped the rehab last week. I'm sure it will be all good and behaving properly in the morning when I really need it to.

Walkers

2009-06-26T17:50:00.003+10:00

I really wish people walking on the roads in the dark would wear more noticeable clothing. What is the point of being healthy if you get hit by my car?

Dairy free diet

2009-06-18T08:04:00.005+10:00

Today is my first true dairy free day. It has taken me this long to find substitute products that don't make me want to throw up. Rice milk is disgusting.

I discussed the gluten free diet with many people including my GP. The general consensus was that unless you have been diagnosed via blood test with coeliac disease, then a gluten free diet was too hard, too restrictive and unnecessary.

With dairy free, it appears there are some reports that show improvement in asthma and sinus conditions and some that don't. Dairy free is much easier to achieve and therefore I am going to give it a go. My GP thinks that any positive result should be seen in 2-3 weeks.

In the meantime I am having some RAST tests for allergies and have an appointment booked with a specialist in February 2010! Never mind - 30 odd years a few more months won't hurt.

Responsibility

2009-06-17T13:52:00.000+10:00

When I was at Pink last week, I had a little boy of about 5 or 6 sat next to me. Now whether he should have been at a Pink concert or not is another debate, but between the support act and the start of Pink, the carers (be it, parents, aunt or sister of this boy) said to me we are just going to leave him here. She said he is ok with this, he'll be ok.

I was shocked than anyone could leave a young child alone at a concert or anywhere really. I guess they did give him a phone so maybe they thought that was ok.

I commented to Jon that I was surprised they had left him. I felt that although they didn't ask me to watch him, it became my responsibility to look out for him. What if there had been an evacuation, or what if I had wanted to go out for a smoke or to the bar for a drink. There is no way I could have left him, how could his "carers?!"?

I couldn't even have left my nearly 10 year old in a situation like that. Now maybe I am being overly paranoid but I don't think so, or maybe he was just a very small 16 year old!

Another win!

2009-06-16T13:47:00.002+10:00

Ah..ha - I just knew that as soon as I put my washing out, it would rain. So today, I put most of it in my non-economical and non-environmentally friendly but ever so handy, tumble dryer and the stuff that couldn't go in the dryer on a rack under the pergola.

Voila...it's raining, but no panic all is good. I planned for this, now I just need to do the same for dinner. Plan that is not put in the dryer!

Confused

2009-06-15T15:51:00.003+10:00

I am so confused. Since mentioning I visited a Naturopath who recommended a dairy and gluten free diet, I have had so many people both here in "blogland" and in "real life" including professionals and those that just think they are and those that are just providing their experiences, pretty much disagreeing with the Naturopath.

There is no doubt that I have sinus problems and have had for so many years, and there is no doubt that food intolerance's may contribute to these problems. However, what to do about it is in doubt.

...........and I got up too early this morning to be thinking about this now, so I will stop trying to figure it out for another day. I am still popping the pills and drinking (bleugh) the potions (tonic) though!

Growing up

2009-06-13T09:07:00.002+10:00

My little girl is growing up fast, to the point that when I catch her out of the corner of my eye, I mistake her for my older girl.

I don't know when she lost those pudgy toddler legs and grew longer leaner legs. I'm not sure exactly which day her hair got long. We have been waiting for it to grow for 4 years and all of a sudden there it is.

It really did take a moment for me to recognise her when I picked her up from pre-school the other day and then I felt like an awful mum - what mum doesn't instantly recognise her own daughter? It's just that she looked tall and her hair was blowing in the wind and of course she was and is beautiful.

She is growing up - she even complained of growing pains in her legs yesterday - at least I hope that's all it was!

Tonic

2009-06-12T18:14:00.001+10:00

For the record, the tonic is foul!

Naturopath - the details

2009-06-12T12:06:00.003+10:00

For many years now (25+) I have suffered with sinus problems. I have had several surgeries to remove nasal polyps and wash and drain the sinus but none have given any results beyond 6 weeks.

For just as long I have been taking anti-histamine daily, I have had various nasal sprays both prescription and non prescription in all the 3 countries that I have lived.

I haven't really had many allergy tests and those I had only raised house dust mite as an issue, however I know that I am allergic to so much more. Certain animals, red wine, dry ice are some of the things that have triggered a reaction in the last 4 weeks.

Further when I was about 18 I developed asthma and again, this has stayed with me though the UK, NZ and Australia.

My nose runs and is blocked almost constantly and lately as I am interacting with more and more clients and professionals I am finding it an embarrassment.

I went to the GP to discuss this again a couple of months ago and all they could suggest was further surgery, of the same I might add.

So I decided to try Iridology.

From our discussion and the iridoligy it appears that I have a sinus issue (well hello!) and a digestive issue. Apparently the two are often linked. She also mentioned a lung issue, but didn't go further into that at this stage, she said just to work on the sinus and the digestive issues first.

She has recommended Fish Oil, (that I already take) Horseradish and Garlic Complex, a tonic and Digestive Enzymes also to eliminate dairy and gluten, ham and pork from my diet.

Liz, it may sound harsh but people that make statements like that usually have good reason and I respect your opinion so am more than happy to hear it. This really is just another avenue for me to try. I did buy the supplements from her, not sure if I had to - just did (on this occasion).

Deb, as you say it is worth a try, I am hoping my health fund will cover most of the cost which is why I am trying it, as for the diet, I can only give it a go. I will go back and see her in just over 6 weeks, I will reserve my full judgement until after that session.

Again - comments are most welcome, I would love to hear your experiences and opinions.

The gum - I have not had any, sometimes I really want it, just to freshen up my mouth after eating usually. I have also noted that I am more thirsty, I think I was using it instead of drinking water.

Naturopath

2009-06-11T17:45:00.003+10:00

I have just come from a visit to a Naturopath - the outcome, she has recommended a Dairy and Gluten free diet, along with many pills and potions.

I think I have a lot of research ahead of me. If anyone has any advice I would be very grateful.

Google will become a very close friend for the next few days.

Long weekends

2009-06-10T15:27:00.007+10:00

I just had a lovely weekend, it started on Friday night, when my son danced with his school dance group in the Sydney West Dance Festival. The girls went off to a friends for the evening and Jon and I were very proud to watch our son dance on stage for the very first time. (We are also very aware that it may also be his last time.) He was great and I know that I am biased but I thought that their dance was the best.

We were so proud that he didn't let peer pressure stop him, he ignored the negative comments and ticked another goal off his list. I should point out that he was the only boy in the group of 30. He has now sang on stage, danced on stage and played in a band on stage and he is still only 9.

Saturday we set off to Nelson Bay to see friends. I am ashamed to say that it has been 18 months since we last visited them but the time gap didn't make any difference.

We ate in and we ate out, we went 10 pin bowling and we walked up Tomaree Heads and watched the whales through binoculars. We played with their dogs and our children on the beach. Some of us drank lots of alcohol and and some of us were more restrained but all of us managed to talk complete nonsense for most of the weekend.

We drove back yesterday (Tuesday) and were in desperate need of any early night. But.... not such luck, Jon and I headed off to the city to see Pink in concert.

She was fantastic. The show was the best, how she manages to still sing when upside down on a trapeze escapes me but I loved every minute of it and would definitely see her again if she comes back in a couple of years.

Day 4

2009-06-02T21:35:00.002+10:00

I have managed 4 days without chewing gum. Day 3 was much easier and today, day 4 has been easier again. Today it was just the habit that caught me out. I didn't get stressed about not having any.

I now just need to remember not to cave in and have just one.

Giving up

2009-05-31T18:24:00.002+10:00

I really didn't think that giving up chewing gum would be so hard. Is it the addiction or the habit, I don't know. Either way, I know that anything that has such a hold can't be good.

Jon's suggestion was have a cigarette, I prefer the cream cake option. Doh! Not good either, giving up the cream cakes and like was how I got onto the gum in the first place.

Almost 2 days down. Wish me luck!

I want some chewing gum!

2009-05-31T15:51:00.000+10:00

I just do. That's all.

I know - it's been forever....

2009-05-30T14:39:00.004+10:00

....and I have no excuses.

My mam has been and gone, we enjoyed (other than her just being here) a fantastic 2 night break in Melbourne. Just the two of us. I really missed my kids (and Jon) but it was so different to see a place, actually see a place. Not having to keep and eye on one, two or three children made such a difference. I was able to eat when and where I wanted to. I could walk or sit. Take a tram or not.

We went to see Billy Elliott and it was sooo good. I miss going to the Theatre with my mam (and I know she hasn't been since I left the UK nearly 8 years ago.

We walked and walked and shopped and shopped and boy did my back know it when I got home. I was in so much pain. It must have been the walking upright and not bending over holding onto a child's hand!

So pretty much since then training has been very low key for me (again!) but I am improving and whilst I want to train hard, I have learned to be patient and let my body heal properly.

Today I was going to a little afternoon tea party with some girlfriends but the weather spoiled that. The kids were going to sit on the side lines and watch Jon play soccer, but when it started to rain, the guilt got the better of me and I cancelled.

Also today, well yesterday but from today, I have decided to try and give up sugar free gum. I really didn't think it would be so hard. I am craving gum and if I can't have that I want Pepsi Max - not a good substitute I don't think. So far I am resisting both. Wish me luck.

Happy Happy Happy

2009-05-03T08:56:00.001+10:00

No reason - well lots, but none in particular - just happy happy happy!

Feeling much better

2009-04-19T09:57:00.002+10:00

We are all feeling much better now. We have all had two good nights sleep, except I had to get up at 4.30am yesterday to go and get my mam from the airport, but that really was not a problem.

Both girls are much better, still have coughs and sometimes a little difficulty breathing but nothing like the other day.

All the kids have taken to grandma straight away again (she was last here 2 years ago).

It is a grey and wet day here at the moment but we are still planning on going into Darling Harbour for the day and me sneaking into the expo for a look around.

Croup

2009-04-17T13:11:00.002+10:00

We have had a rough night, we, being me and my kids are exhausted. Last night at 1.30am Miss T woke with a coughing fit brought on by croup (though I wasn't sure at the time that it was croup). She was really distressed and panicking because she couldn't breathe. Jon was away and despite my first aid training, I really didn't know what to do, I was very close to calling an ambulance, instead I put a call in to Jon in Melbourne.

My kids have never had croup before and as Miss T has asthma as well I was really scared and not able to make a rational decision as to what to do.

I gave her panadol for her fever and ventolin in the hope that it would help her breathing. An hour later she still couldn't breathe properly so I got the other kids up and we headed to the emergency department. (I couldn't even call my mum because she was on a plane to come and see us.)

By the time we got to the hospital, she had calmed and her breathing was much easier. The hospital still wanted her to stay for 3 more hours for observation.

We got back home at 7am this morning and I called Jon to let him know. I hadn't called him to tell him we were at hospital because she was ok and we didn't all need to be sleep deprived.

My son managed to curl himself up into the tiniest ball on a chair and get 20 minutes of sleep before I had to wake him to go home.

We had some breakfast and all went back to bed. Miss T struggled a few times, waking me up with a terrified look on her face saying she couldn't breathe, but this time I felt more in control and calmed her and gave her more ventolin.

I feel for those who are single parents and have to deal with situations like these on their own all the time. I am so looking forward to Jon getting home tonight and my mum arriving in the morning. I'm not sure I'm looking forward to the 6am pickup though! I need some sleep.

Abdominal ultrasound

2009-04-16T12:03:00.003+10:00

I have just been to the physio again, this time to look at a long term back issue. This issue started when I was 18 and had a car accident and dislocated my pelvis.

For 4 years now I have been having 2 monthly chiropractic appointments to keep my back functional but really these days it rarely causes me any problems.

The physio said she would rather I didn't see any other practitioners while I was seeing her (so that she and I could be certain what treatments and I guess which practitioner was helping).

Consequently I missed my regular chiro appointment. I decided to ask the physio for her opinion.

Apparently, my back is moving bizarrely. I also objected rather loudly when she poked and prodded various places, in particular L4. Part of her assessment was to see how the core performs and then to see if simply teaching correct core activation will help strengthen by back.

It was strange having an ultrasound for a reason other than pregnancy, but I did get to see my abdominal muscles, my internal and external obliques and my transverse abdominus - not as exciting as seeing a new baby but still...

She took a still of my abs in their relaxed state and then split the screen and asked me to activate my core.

Result - perfect core activation.

Now, she had no quick and easy explanation for my back problems. So I need x-rays to establish what treatment will fix it.

Cruel trick

2009-04-15T21:47:00.002+10:00

Someone was playing a very cruel trick on me this evening.

Imagine - I was cycling towards the top of a very large hill on my trusty exercise bike when I heard that fantastic whirring noise of the bike ramping down, YES, I had reached the top and I had 3 minutes of a small hill to enjoy before I encountered another very large hill - BUT - NO......

........tonight we must be on the flight path and it was the whirring of an aeroplane coming in to land and I still had another 52 seconds still to go!!!

Junk mail

2009-04-15T02:45:00.001+10:00

How much junk mail do we get? I don't mean the junk mail that advertises ways for us to spend our very hard earned money, but the junk that is actually addressed to us. The pointless information that is sent to us every day through the postal system.

Unless my kids are having a splurge on scribbling, I never need to find them fresh paper, they draw on the back of the scrap paper that gets delivered to our door, err not in England any more, to our mail boxes, every day.

Do you believe, all things happen for a reason?

2009-04-13T08:34:00.002+10:00

Jon and I were both non committal on going camping this weekend. Weeks ago we were really excited about it but as the time got nearer, we were both so busy that neither of us managed to arrange anything.

We decided that on Saturday, we would get up and head to a campsite in Canberra. - None of us have been to Canberra before.

We got there and pitched the tent, why does it look smaller than I remembered?

The space saving bunk beds for the kids, yeah right, they were huge, I think my garage must have some growth hormone in there that worked on the bunk beds but not on the tent.

Never mind, all is ok, barely. Off we head to Questacon. Kids had a good time, Miss C was a little (well a lot) scared of the clowns but we got over that.

As we came out of Questacon it started to rain. - great!

We struggled to find somewhere to eat. I wanted a nice family restaurant but all we could find were nice, posh, trendy looking places with wine glasses already on the table, nice but not where I wanted to take 3 tired children.

We found a little Chinese restaurant that would do.

Headed back to the tent and least said the better, tiny, cramped, wet and the ground was so hard. Didn't sleep all night, was very achy and extremely cranky and unless drastic improvements are made, I will not be going again.

We had planned to go to another campsite but instead at 5am packed up and came home. At least it had stopped raining by then.

What was the reason? By midday Miss C had a 39.7 temperature and was not feeling at all well. Last night she was up again, more panadol administered.

We were not supposed to be camping last night or having a very long drive home today. All things happen for a reason.

Shoulder news

2009-04-11T15:03:00.000+10:00

My shoulder is improving heaps, I am still limited to upper body training of rotator cuff strengthening in neutral and lower body - body weight training only (due to not being able to hold any hand weights or use a barbell) - but I can live with that so long as it is a means to an end.

My triceps have retained strength for several consecutive weeks and the neural pain (ssshhh) has disappeared.

I don't doubt there is still a way to go, my right rotator cuff strength is so much weaker than my non dominant left side but I think this is the physio to get me there.

We won one.....

2009-04-10T08:17:00.002+10:00

little Easter Egg raffle, Miss T's first Easter Hat Parade and assembly. She won a little hamper, she is so happy - and she wants to share with everyone, teachers, siblings, friends, parents, dance teachers. I love her.

Growing up and determination

2009-04-09T09:45:00.000+10:00

Well that's it. You know your kids are growing up when the last training wheels (stabilizers to all of us from England) come off the bikes. My youngest learned to ride her bike last weekend. We do have legs that are black and blue from the experience but they will heal.

What I noticed most however, was her determination, she kept on going and going despite the blood and bruises. She decided that this was the day she was going to learn - and she did.

She didn't try to complete the Tour de France, she did little baby steps, she was just so happy to get 2 metres (well from the skipping rope to the skittle) without falling off or putting her feet down.

Kids can teach us so much!